The shootings in Orlando and the reactions from various people around the country has had me thinking for the last week. The posted reaction from politicians, some clergy, the Pope, and the gay community itself seem to be all over the board. Those of you who choose to read this will have to bare in mind that it's my own opinion and I don't expect you to agree with it. Frankly I actually care very little what most of you think. Some of you will express opinions that agree or disagree, How much credence that I give each opinion depends only on one thing. How much I value you as a human. I'll admit right now I know some of you enough and the answer is damn little.
WE as a gay community demand gay rights. Supposedly we want to be treated just like everybody else. We want legal benefits and rights. We want the same treatment economically, the same rights to bathrooms and wedding cakes and the list seems to be unending.
WELL IF THATS TRUE, THEN WE NEED TO START BEHAVING LIKE WE DESERVE THOSE RIGHTS. Marching in a gay pride parade, dressed in fetish wear is not the answer. Wearing only a rainbow colored jock and riding on a float with a bunch of drag queens carrying a sign saying "We are with you Orlando" is not the answer. A gay pride parade has not one thing to do with marching for gay rights. Its strictly an event for self expression. If you can prove me correct then somebody please cite an example. Its not marching for solidarity, I didn't hear anyone chanting "gay lives matter". Citing the feeling of safety because the local police had to show up in force and patrol trying to head off any violence is not demanding equal rights. Equal rights under the law maybe, but frankly that's a piece of paper that is worthless unless in the eyes of the world we are just as normal as everyone else. Every time we hide in the closet we are allowing prejudice, Every time we sneak into a bathroom because we are transgender we are allowing prejudice, When we form our own sports leagues, and gay Olympics, and car clubs etc. we are allowing prejudice and segregating ourselves. I myself am guilty of these types of actions. I tried to hide my sexuality most of my life, from my Parents, my family, my friends, business associates you name it. Its easier to lie about it by omission than to be brave and face the consequences by just being honest. You see at this age I am tired of the struggle. I don't attend gay pride events. Not because I am ashamed of being gay. I gave that up years ago. Because that type of behavior disgusts me. I don't want to watch a gay man hump his boyfriends leg, anymore than I want to watch a straight man hump his wife's leg. I don't want to attend a parade for nudists any more that I want to attend a gay pride parade. The scenery at both is equally disgusting and usually in poor taste. I don't want to parade around the streets advertising what I do in the privacy of my own home, and I don't want to know what you do in yours, and what the hell do you want the police and the government knowing as well.
Don't bother to argue that gay pride events are used as fund raisers in support of the gay community. Yes in some small part that is true. Tragically the amount of money raised at those events is usually embarrassingly small. Less that ten thousand dollars for a pride parade the size of Phoenix's, Less than two dollars for everyone participation. Cheap Bastards. There are some truly wonderful individuals in Phoenix that dedicate time, energy, and money to causes, and you can count them on one hand.
Basically what I am saying is that if we as a community want to be treated equally, then its time we start acting like we deserve it. We need to start doing our part. Time to mobilize, and march in unison when an injustice is done. If you are transgender and need to piss. Don't make a federal case about it. Just walk in and use the bathroom of your choice. Trust me some people may talk but the majority of them wont give a shit. We need to show up in force when the Westborough Baptist Church decides to protest. They always announce their intentions and frankly they are not one bit afraid of the gay community. The minister that was assaulted by the young girl last week should have been assaulted by many other gays as well. He earned it. He deserved it. Maybe if somebody clocks him upside the head with a bat everytime he spews his hatred he will learn to keep his ignorant mouth shut. Elected officials that make public statements that are disparaging to gays need to hear from us, through phone calls, emails and even marching to the courthouse or wherever his local offices are. We are too passive. We can get married and we do it at private homes or the justice of the peace or by some county official. Hell have a wedding, rent a venue, order a cake, have a reception and demand to enjoy the ceremony just like anyone else would. Put on suits, look like the responsible people that we are and attend political functions demanding attention by our actions and our voices. We are not a stupid group. We are intelligent, and we have valid opinions and beliefs and we have become far too passive.
I have become far to passive myself. From now on if I get caught up in the emotion and I want to reach across the table and touch my partners hand at a nice restaurant for dinner I am going to. Everybody already thinks to men at a romantic dinner are gay anyway. Time to show how proud we are of our partners and that we love them just like everybody else does. I am sitting at Starbucks listening to two Indian immigrants speaking in their native language. They have more rights than we do and I was born here.
Wednesday, June 29, 2016
Wednesday, June 15, 2016
The Apathy of the Educated.
I have to say I like Facebook. I believe at its inception it was based as a noble way to disseminate information to the masses and connect large groups of individuals. In my case it has allowed me to get in touch with friends from the past, family, keep in touch with people from parts of the country where I used to live, and I use it to publish some of my blogs and opinions. The part of Facebook that I find incredibly distasteful deals with the negativity and ignorance on display every day. I am going to use this blog to cite some examples that irritate me the most.
Lets start with the total lack of respect shown to our political candidates. When I was growing up there were political pundits, they drew cartoons and wrote editorials about their disdain for the candidates, but they were harmless and respectful as well. This new era of saying the most vile things about our politicians it disgusting. I have to admit I have been pretty hard on a few of them myself. Usually having the facts to back up my opinion. But I don't say vulgar things, or personal things about any candidate. Let me be clear. I don't think either of our choices are qualified to be President of the United States. Making critical posts about ones wife's ass, how tackily they dress, their ignorance, are just among a few of the less disparaging points. This serves no purpose but to bring the country down, and make us look ignorant in the eyes of the world. Which frankly I don't care about.
Next. Some of you know I recently quit my job. I have at age 52 started studying again so that I can change the direction of my life. Do you think I like that. Hell no, but I am a realist and the way things are in the present world I need to change myself so that I can produce the income that I am accustomed to. By the way. I am paying for it myself. No loans, no grants, no free education because I want a better job. I am responsible for the choices that I make and If I want to change my life then I should pay for it. Not the government or anybody else. If you went to school and you got a student loan then you should pay for it. If you graduated from high school in this country you are smart enough to read the ads for jobs on craigslist or the various internet sites Career Builder etc and see what the average salaries are. Do the math and figure out that if they are offering $10.00 per hour for jobs in your chosen field. Then when you graduate with $80.k in student loan debt you have no way to pay for it. I made $15.00 / hour as an operations manager for a small flooring distributor. I did not leave because I was unhappy with my salary. I left because one of my bosses was a rat bastard. I was responsible for moving $200K worth of product through our warehouse a month. I did the ordering, the receiving, the shipping etc. I was good at my job and proud of the work I did. The average starting wage for an operations manager in phoenix is around $11.00 per hour. When I hear the argument that fast food workers deserve a minimum wage of $15.00 per hour it really pisses me off. Especially when their percentage rate of getting my order correct is about 30%. Jobs in that realm were meant to be part time jobs to teach young adults how to work. They were never meant to support a family. Its not my fault that you were privileged when you grew up and you made it all the way through college and never held down a job. I pity you because chances are you are going to fail at your first few. Somehow we turned into a society of minimums. We do the minimum to get by at work, at school and most of us as humans to get by. Those same people who produce so little demand absolute perfection of others. Well my advice to you is go fuck yourself. Pay should be based on job performance.
The last think I am going to address is the shooing in the gay club in Orlando. Personally I don't care the shooter was a Muslim. I am not surprised that he was, but frankly I have been waiting for it to happen. I read a post on Facebook Monday where the author asked why is there no unity in the gay community, Why aren't they marching for equal rights like the blacks did. Good question. A pride parade is not a show of unity in the eyes of the world. It is no better than a circus freak show. I watched news coverage the day after the massacre on the pride parade in Los Angeles and one of the floats they featured showed some 400# man wearing nothing but a pride painted jock. If you think that is showing one ounce of respect for the victims you are just as disgusting as he is. Pride parades have nothing to do with solidarity, they are simply a venue for everybody to show some sort of self expression. At a straight bar two years ago after the pride event was over. One of the gay patrons was wearing a thong with an erect penis. He was the only one dressed that way. This particular pride event is held in a small town. Very respectful, the town comes out to celebrate it. It is the only pride event that I have ever attended. I asked him why he was behaving that way and dressed so inappropriately and his response was "because I can". That is the perfect example of what's wrong with the gay community. As much as you think that its about your rights and your freedoms and protections under the law you couldn't be more wrong. When you wanted to be treated just like everybody else, same laws, same protections "Equal Rights", then its your responsibility to behave like everybody else as well. Just because same sex marriage is legal now doesn't mean that you have reached equality and most of you think you have. Not to mention how little respect that you show for the people who have fought those battles for you. Let me give you a little insight about how equal you really are. I have been gay all my life. I may not have known it when I was younger, but I knew I was different. I had teachers, coaches, classmates all question it before I even understood what gay was. Men at restaurants used to stare at me when I was in high school, I didn't know why. When I figured it out I stayed in the closet for a long time. I have been in Topeka Kansas when the Westborough Baptist Church was protesting carrying their God Hates Fags and Aid's is God's punishment for Fags. Did it hurt. I would be lying if I said it didn't. I was standing outside a gay bar in Louisville KY one evening when a pickup drove by and sprayed the building with bullets. Nobody wanted to call the police because they didn't want to bring any undue attention to the "Gay Bar". I have to admit right now that I am more in love with my boyfriend than I ever have been. I view this as my last chance to have the kind of relationship that I have wanted my whole life. I came close once. At my age I probably wont get another. Someday I plan to marry this man. It is legal today to be married to another man, I thought I would never see that day. Can I walk down the street holding his hand and feel equal, NO, can we sit on the court house lawn in Prescott eating ice cream and can I lean over and kiss him, NO, can we check into a nice motel and have the desk clerk not ask if we would rather have two beds, NO. Just in case you are gay and haven't figured it out yet. You are not equal. We need to continue the fight, we need to be diligent, we need to act like respectful human beings and march for solidarity. We need to show up on the state capital steps in groups dressed as the lawyers, realtors, doctors, dentists, carpenters, mechanics, and operation managers that we are and demand to be treated as the equals we are. How about a million fag march to Washington is anyone willing to do that. It hasn't happened yet. The participants at the Stonewall riots must be sadly disappointed at how little movement has been made since they made those original sacrifices.
Lets start with the total lack of respect shown to our political candidates. When I was growing up there were political pundits, they drew cartoons and wrote editorials about their disdain for the candidates, but they were harmless and respectful as well. This new era of saying the most vile things about our politicians it disgusting. I have to admit I have been pretty hard on a few of them myself. Usually having the facts to back up my opinion. But I don't say vulgar things, or personal things about any candidate. Let me be clear. I don't think either of our choices are qualified to be President of the United States. Making critical posts about ones wife's ass, how tackily they dress, their ignorance, are just among a few of the less disparaging points. This serves no purpose but to bring the country down, and make us look ignorant in the eyes of the world. Which frankly I don't care about.
Next. Some of you know I recently quit my job. I have at age 52 started studying again so that I can change the direction of my life. Do you think I like that. Hell no, but I am a realist and the way things are in the present world I need to change myself so that I can produce the income that I am accustomed to. By the way. I am paying for it myself. No loans, no grants, no free education because I want a better job. I am responsible for the choices that I make and If I want to change my life then I should pay for it. Not the government or anybody else. If you went to school and you got a student loan then you should pay for it. If you graduated from high school in this country you are smart enough to read the ads for jobs on craigslist or the various internet sites Career Builder etc and see what the average salaries are. Do the math and figure out that if they are offering $10.00 per hour for jobs in your chosen field. Then when you graduate with $80.k in student loan debt you have no way to pay for it. I made $15.00 / hour as an operations manager for a small flooring distributor. I did not leave because I was unhappy with my salary. I left because one of my bosses was a rat bastard. I was responsible for moving $200K worth of product through our warehouse a month. I did the ordering, the receiving, the shipping etc. I was good at my job and proud of the work I did. The average starting wage for an operations manager in phoenix is around $11.00 per hour. When I hear the argument that fast food workers deserve a minimum wage of $15.00 per hour it really pisses me off. Especially when their percentage rate of getting my order correct is about 30%. Jobs in that realm were meant to be part time jobs to teach young adults how to work. They were never meant to support a family. Its not my fault that you were privileged when you grew up and you made it all the way through college and never held down a job. I pity you because chances are you are going to fail at your first few. Somehow we turned into a society of minimums. We do the minimum to get by at work, at school and most of us as humans to get by. Those same people who produce so little demand absolute perfection of others. Well my advice to you is go fuck yourself. Pay should be based on job performance.
The last think I am going to address is the shooing in the gay club in Orlando. Personally I don't care the shooter was a Muslim. I am not surprised that he was, but frankly I have been waiting for it to happen. I read a post on Facebook Monday where the author asked why is there no unity in the gay community, Why aren't they marching for equal rights like the blacks did. Good question. A pride parade is not a show of unity in the eyes of the world. It is no better than a circus freak show. I watched news coverage the day after the massacre on the pride parade in Los Angeles and one of the floats they featured showed some 400# man wearing nothing but a pride painted jock. If you think that is showing one ounce of respect for the victims you are just as disgusting as he is. Pride parades have nothing to do with solidarity, they are simply a venue for everybody to show some sort of self expression. At a straight bar two years ago after the pride event was over. One of the gay patrons was wearing a thong with an erect penis. He was the only one dressed that way. This particular pride event is held in a small town. Very respectful, the town comes out to celebrate it. It is the only pride event that I have ever attended. I asked him why he was behaving that way and dressed so inappropriately and his response was "because I can". That is the perfect example of what's wrong with the gay community. As much as you think that its about your rights and your freedoms and protections under the law you couldn't be more wrong. When you wanted to be treated just like everybody else, same laws, same protections "Equal Rights", then its your responsibility to behave like everybody else as well. Just because same sex marriage is legal now doesn't mean that you have reached equality and most of you think you have. Not to mention how little respect that you show for the people who have fought those battles for you. Let me give you a little insight about how equal you really are. I have been gay all my life. I may not have known it when I was younger, but I knew I was different. I had teachers, coaches, classmates all question it before I even understood what gay was. Men at restaurants used to stare at me when I was in high school, I didn't know why. When I figured it out I stayed in the closet for a long time. I have been in Topeka Kansas when the Westborough Baptist Church was protesting carrying their God Hates Fags and Aid's is God's punishment for Fags. Did it hurt. I would be lying if I said it didn't. I was standing outside a gay bar in Louisville KY one evening when a pickup drove by and sprayed the building with bullets. Nobody wanted to call the police because they didn't want to bring any undue attention to the "Gay Bar". I have to admit right now that I am more in love with my boyfriend than I ever have been. I view this as my last chance to have the kind of relationship that I have wanted my whole life. I came close once. At my age I probably wont get another. Someday I plan to marry this man. It is legal today to be married to another man, I thought I would never see that day. Can I walk down the street holding his hand and feel equal, NO, can we sit on the court house lawn in Prescott eating ice cream and can I lean over and kiss him, NO, can we check into a nice motel and have the desk clerk not ask if we would rather have two beds, NO. Just in case you are gay and haven't figured it out yet. You are not equal. We need to continue the fight, we need to be diligent, we need to act like respectful human beings and march for solidarity. We need to show up on the state capital steps in groups dressed as the lawyers, realtors, doctors, dentists, carpenters, mechanics, and operation managers that we are and demand to be treated as the equals we are. How about a million fag march to Washington is anyone willing to do that. It hasn't happened yet. The participants at the Stonewall riots must be sadly disappointed at how little movement has been made since they made those original sacrifices.
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